Author: honestplacebo

Loyal to the pack.

Wrong hole again

Wonka-wilder

You can learn a lot about a person by listening to where in the sky they think the sun should start shining. Or some other intelligent opinion because the one thing people love more than having an opinion about all there is under the sun (and above) is having the impression that their opinion is Willy Wonka and that the rest of the people around them only have Oompa Loompas in between their ears. The terms people/person are used lightly.

North-west would be great for me. Not because my house doesn’t get enough sunlight, but because my house would block the sun in my neighbor’s living room so it would be cold in there, therefore they wouldn’t be able to spend a lot of time in the living room and everybody know that if you don’t spend at least 3 hours/ day in that particular room, you die. It’s a fact. I read it in this piece of paper from a magazine I found under a box, under the seat of my bus while heading to study what potatoes do during Mondays.

Today I found myself in a room with a few other people, see? And these people needed a trigger to release their Willy Wonkas, see? So ask me what the trigger was! I dare you! I double dare you mother tucker!

“The church is collecting signatures to forbid gay marriage so I signed their petition. I signed it in a second.”

(Then they all started saying how gay marriage is wrong and unnatural and evil. How gay marriage is a sin. How gay marriage killed one of their fathers back in the war. How gay marriage went out to buy some smokes and never came back. How gay marriage stepped in gum one day and scraped it of its shoe and then stuck it in Sally’s hair.)

They continued to say how homosexuality is a disease and how in the old days they would “take care” of people like that. If this wasn’t pitifully saddening they topped it by saying something along the lines of:
Being gay is b-b-b-bad, but letting a gay couple have kids (artificial insemination) /adopt is b-b-b-bad to the bone! *This has been put extremely lightly*

When is the last time you went to an orphanage? And I don’t mean a decent one. I mean a low to barely funded orphanage almost forgotten by the responsible officials. I am not talking about an orphanage in a big glimmering jewel of a city. I am talking about one situated in a place where all the citizens have it pretty hard.

Do you think that a child is better off without a loving family and an education? Because guess what! Gay parents kiss their kids before they put them to bed, they take their kids to school mornings and pick them up when school is over and they love children as any parent does.
Gay parents do not “gay up” their kids. Sexual preferences aren’t picked up like you pick up a cold. Take your Willy Wonka outta my face, people! Your opinions imply that more kids should remain orphans because gay couples are going to ruin them. Living in an orphanage is surely better than having two parents in your life that take care of you and love you every single day for the rest of your life.

So to all of the people who have bright ideas and sizzling brains because they though really, really, really hard and came to the conclusion that others should not be recognized by the state as a family because they have a similar anatomy in their pants -news flash- your Willy Wonka (opinion) came out of the wrong hole again-your mouth.

Simplicity

ht_BuildaSandbox_hero_image

I miss the simplicity of childhood identity, a time when no matter the background people could become friends easily. It did not matter who your mother or father were or how much you had; a simple exchange of names and a few hours of playing together were enough to form friendships. But then you get older and you realize how people are and that sandbox friendship dream is crushed as easily as a fragile flower.
How many of your childhood friends can you rely on? Or better said, how many are still around?
It still happens rarely to bond with people as adults and form friendships. And even rarer are the occasions when true honesty with these people is an option. In these cases if you should be given the chance to form a life together…marry them. Marry the fuck out of them!

Déjà vu

Spring time came and spring time went,

Flowers bloomed and branches bent.

It was back in the 90′ when they met,

It was a simple time, not easy to forget.

She was twenty, he was twenty and a bit,

Youth so pure holding so much promise,

Their love grew, by mutual passion lit,

They’d become one when they’d kiss.

She fell ill, he stood at her side bravely,

They were growing old much too soon,

Their future seemed to grow dark sadly;

Hardly being brightened by sun or moon;

She got worse, but he was always near,

The meds she was given put her to sleep,

The pain would be the thing she’d fear.

Their tests were hard, but their bond deep.

In time she felt better, but bearing a child

Could mean death as she’d been weakened

Then and forever, but their passion was wild,

So they took a chance, as love beckoned.

Not long passed and they had a baby boy,

For the first time in ages they felt true joy,

She defied the odds and it gave her power,

But sadly, days passed, along came the hour

When she fell ill again, but loved she was

Doctors failed repeatedly to find the cause

Time passed and she slowly withered away

Years passed and she hurts even this day.

Her husband is dying on the inside to see

Her this ill once again and it is agony to be,

So helpless when your wife is suffering so,

Worse than she did almost a life time ago.

Too many opinions from kings of medicine,

Too many empty pills meant to dry up tears.

Have I been a good son, who have I been?

Can I be brave forever, face all of my fears?

What of my father and the hurt that he holds?

Mother’s pain has lasted my whole life through,

For me it’s all I’ve known and yet it still unfolds,

For him it’s a nightmare, a tormenting déjà vu.

I’ll hold them both tightly until things get better,

Hope is all I have and hope is what I will give

Them no matter the tears or stormy weather;

Love and hope spread and joy you’ll receive.

Cardiac implosion

Imagine spending a day playing with these little guys. Are you imagining it yet? Good. Now tell me that it wasn’t the best day ever. Don’t lie. You know nothing can top all that fluffiness. Good. Now go to your significant other and tell them that this day topped the day you met them and the day you took that special trip to that special place and the day you got married and so on. You are alone now, but you played with husky puppies so you don’t care. Husky puppies a.k.a. little wolves that nibble on your soul. Is it possible to die from happiness? Yes. If you don’t have a husky puppy near you, or a dog, go and adopt an animal from the local pound and love them to bits. Thank you!

Boo hoo

Luxury could mean a ski trip in the Alps, a new sports car or dining at an exclusive restaurant by the seaside with a great view of the sunset, but it could also mean a good night’s sleep, mornings where you are not woken up at the crack of dawn by the inconsiderate behavior of others and peace of mind.
Give someone everything one could ask for, except the ability to rest properly and it’ll all be for nothing.
When people ask what’s the matter, you just tell them you’re busy, because they’re too ignorant to care that they completely fuck up your entire day by keeping you awake and explaining it again and again just causes more disgust.

Press any key to get your fix

This friend of mine has this problem. Ok, it’s me! You got me. I am a “game junkie”.

Since I was 13(I’m 22 now) I’ve been into video games and I’ve played my share of most genres. I remember fondly when, in high school, my friends and I would all go online and play for hours on end. My parents were great growing up, but having to take care of an older family member that had a severe drinking problem, plus some other issues really used to get me down. The solution to this difficult situation was none other than hanging around the internet, playing solo or with others for a lot of time. A lot of time. It helped me forget the bullshit. It was simple. Things are simple when you don’t realize that you’re wasting too much time and one day you find yourself playing games so much it’s all you do. That was high school though.
Before I got into med school my father’s uncle (the older family member I mentioned) passed away due to a stroke. Without him around things were easier. Taking care of someone with an addiction for alcohol is harder than one might think. I felt more relaxed and I cut down on my gaming because I didn’t need to escape from reality that much.
Sadly, the past months have gotten me back on this slippery slope that is gaming addiction. My mom’s sickness got worse. An undiagnosed condition that causes her extremely painful pulsating migraines almost 24/7. She’s seen so many doctors, you’d think it’d be better by now. Not being able to do much in this situation and seeing constant suffering has made me get back into my old habits. Escaping just for 5 minutes is great, but 5 minutes is never enough. I’ve tried limiting my play time and failed. I’ve tried quitting several times and failed every time. Now I’m trying again by putting it all down in writing to try and see the bigger picture. Playing too much makes me feel guilty because I don’t get enough work done properly. I want to become a doctor worthy of taking care of his patients. A well informed and empathetic doctor that can offer hope and treat as many people as possible and maybe, just maybe, find new means of treating certain medical conditions through research.

I often have trouble sleeping and become numb from exhaustion. This makes me want to escape as I used to. I get support from those close to me, but ultimately it is a test of will and I’ve never been the strong willed type. It does feel good though; the moment you quit for a while. I makes me feel free, but afterward I imprison myself.

I need to focus on the positives as hard as it might be sometimes. Maybe the sun will shine my way some day soon. Util then I need to make a change. And I should start by breaking the habit.

Dendenland Part I

I feel that tomorrow should be as a second Christmas and even though it is going to be an eventful, busy, busy day I hope that everything will go smoothly and end well. On the 12th of January last year I met face-to-face a lovely young woman that changed both my life and myself for the better. I find myself extremely shy in expressing my gratitude for the moment being, therefore I am sharing this small token of my appreciation:

Snow(not related to Jon)

The first has yet again returned,

My hand held yours as the night’s sky burned

With colors from the brightest of dreams.

We raised our glases through cheers and screams,

Coat covering your shoulder, watch on my wrist,

Make a wish, my love, we all have a wish list.

Clothes and trips and rigs and other silly things

I’d like us to posses and enjoy. A thought clings,

In the back of my mind and it seems to find

A way to push through the moment and grind;

We are ever so fortunate to live this life,

Where we have each other to chase away strife.

The holidays might end, but the World is still mad

There are human beings everywhere too sad,

Too poor, too sick and too jaded to dare to smile.

I know we cannot help them all, but for a while,

Let us think of them and wish them well at least

May they find shelter and love and have a feast.

At least for a few moments each day let us do so,

For we are blessed to have somewhere to go;

A place where our loved ones prosper and live,

Let us remember to respect, appreciate and give.

Through compassion and empathy let us show,

That humanity can cover the Earth just like snow.